9 Reasons Why It’s Imperative We Talk About Money

Money talk might not be as riveting as the latest Netflix series, but it's a crucial chat to have with our inner circle. Today we’re going to go through nine reasons why discussing money with friends and family matters:

1. Strengthening Relationships: Sharing financial stories creates deeper connections. Discussing money fosters trust and openness, strengthening bonds and building a supportive network. Opening up about your financial wins, losses, goals and dreams can deepen your relationship with just about anyone because it shows you trust them. There are so many people who would rather get naked with someone than ask them about their credit score. By bringing up your personal financial situation with someone, you make yourself vulnerable and therefore show them you’re willing to trust them.

2. Learning Opportunities: Everyone has unique financial experiences! Chatting about money allows you to learn from others’ successes and mistakes, gaining valuable insights and different perspectives. Something the rich know well is that gatekeeping doesn’t get you far- by opening up about your finances, you may be able to teach a friend or family member an important lesson you learned the hard way and spare them the grief. This could happen to you too, getting to learn from someone’s mistake or success will only help you in the long run. Getting a great rate on your HYSA? Why wouldn’t you want to shout it from the mountaintops!?

3. Financial Support System: When life throws lemons, having a supportive circle is like making lemonade. Talking money opens doors for advice, guidance, and even potential financial assistance during tough times. We’re not just talking about an emergency loan when you run out of cash, we’re talking about learning how to call your credit card company and get your rate lowered, or getting help finding new employment when experiencing job loss.

4. Breaking Stigma and Taboos: Talking money breaks down barriers and taboos surrounding finances. It normalizes discussions about financial struggles and successes, reducing stigma and shame. I want to shout this from the highest peak on the tallest mountain- 👏MONEY 👏SHOULD NOT 👏 BE 👏 A 👏 TABOO👏 I totally understand if you’re uncomfortable going into detail about how much you make, the exact amount of debt you carry or how much money you have saved for retirement with the average person in your life. What I want is to build up a world where when we trust people with our secrets, we can also trust them with our finances. I think it’s perfectly normal for friends to know how much each other earns. If I know you are saving up for a new car, I’m far more likely to think up budget friendly outings because I respect you and want to see you fulfill your dreams. Breaking the stigma allows us to respect one another far more than it does the opposite.

5. Shared Goals and Accountability: Discussing financial goals with loved ones helps in setting and achieving them together. Sharing aspirations creates mutual accountability and motivation for success. If you tell someone you’re trying to pay extra towards your student loans, or want to pay off a credit card by a certain date, your goal can become something they cheer for, making the celebration all the more sweeter. There’s not need to be in this alone!

6. Avoiding Misunderstandings: Misunderstandings can sprout from unspoken financial expectations. Open conversations prevent assumptions and potential conflicts over money matters. If you’re on a tight budget because of a financial goal, your friends and family are better able to support you if they know. You never should need to justify setting a boundary but sometimes entrusting a close friend or family member with that information can help them understand why you decline something or do things differently.

7. Mental Health and Well-being: Financial stress can take a toll on mental health. Speaking about money concerns can alleviate stress and anxiety, promoting better mental well-being. If you think this helps, you should definitely check out therapy too! Not being sarcastic here. Talking about things that worry us, in this case money, can reduce the burden. In many cases, a counselor or therapist can be qualified to listen to your financial worries, but sometimes it’s more comfortable to talk with someone we know and trust. Either way, talking is good for you and you should do it as often as you feel the need.

8. Set Boundaries: This was touched upon briefly in number six, but it’s important to circle back and highlight. Sometimes, like around the holidays, friends and family might expect us to behave, and therefore spend, in a particular way. Being transparent about your debt, goals or overall financial situation can help establish boundaries. While a good friend or family member should respect a boundary, like a spending limit on holiday gifts for example, on its own sometimes you may need some additional information to get them to understand and respect a limit you may set. Saying something like “I’d love to participate in the family gift exchange this year but I’m working really hard to pay off my car loan. Can we set a limit of $XX this year?” may be challenging, but what’s even more challenging is living with excessive, self imposed financial pressure because you weren’t transparent. It can be hard to set boundaries of any kind, especially financial ones, but something you’ll learn quickly is that they pay dividends with the peace of mind and bottom line you’ll get out of it.

9. Creating A World We Want To Live In: Would you want your close friend or family member to drown? Obviously not! If they were drowning metaphorically under a pile of credit card debt, hopefully you’d want to help them out in a similar way to if they were in physical trouble. Helping others doesn’t need to be in the form of cash gifts. Think about it though- take your BFF. If you knew they were in a tough spot financially, hopefully you’d think twice about making your monthly catch up session at an expensive restaurant and instead would consider going for coffee or doing a home cooked meal instead. It’s about time together much more than it is where you meet up. By talking about our financial situation with our inner circle and normalizing sharing our struggles and successes with each other we create a stronger sense of community. Being transparent about your financial situation, as you choose to discuss it, will garner respect from those you confide in and hopefully foster an environment where they feel safe and comfortable confiding in you too. Taking initiative and leading the charge to open up the dialogue may be scary, but I promise it’s worth it in the name of stronger relationships.

Remember, initiating money talks might feel awkward at first, but the benefits far outweigh the discomfort. Start small, choose the right moment, and approach the conversation with empathy and openness. Consider breaking up conversations into smaller topics or subjects to test the waters with each important person in your life. Not everyone will be ready to open up in return, so consider prefacing a conversation by saying something like “I want to talk about my personal financial situation with you. I trust that you’ll keep this confidential and don’t expect you to reciprocate right away, but I hope in the future you feel comfortable talking about your finances with me too.”

By fostering an environment where money chats are normal, we create a supportive space for growth, learning, and stronger relationships. So, grab a cup of coffee (at home or at a coffee shop!), gather your pals, and let's break the money talk taboo together! 💬💸✨